being dismissed … things that irk

There is a feeling of discomfort that comes with being dismissed as “new-agey” “hippy-dippy” etc. Someone on my Facebook feed posted this article:

New Age Roommate Has A Crystal For That

Which promptly got a series of likes from dudes, and “LOL” type comments. Being that the comments were from dudes and this article was about a lady, I am questioning how much of the dismissal is patriarchal. How much different would it be if the lady in the story were a guy? I am aware this is a joke article, I just didn’t find it funny. It perpetuates the stereotype that I always find myself up against. People ask me about my beliefs, and then don’t listen because they’re so quick to dismiss me.

If I were a man talking about crystals, would you listen more closely? Science is what’s behind all of my beliefs about crystals and energy and resonance. Why, then am I met with either laughter or anger about it most of the time? And particularly by men?

My husband doesn’t believe in a lot of the things that I do. But he would defend my right to do it. He doesn’t dismiss me or what I believe. We’ve never had the same spiritual beliefs, but we manage to respect each other and support each other anyway. I guess this is part of why it baffles me that others have to constantly put people down.  I’m really questioning the part of it that is about men, putting down a woman, for her spiritual beliefs. It’s happened within religion and throughout history. I’m pretty sure these guys don’t even know they’re participating in it. Micro-aggressions are often difficult to maneuver around in my head, because they’re so insidious. My intuition is right on though. I can feel the tone of the dismissal – You feel like I’m not intelligent and you don’t have to take me seriously. It feels like you’re laughing it off because you don’t want to consider it. It feels like you might think I’m stupid or that you’re scared of what I represent. I just can’t quite put my finger on it. I guess I’ll just wiggle it at you to freak you out 😉

Yes, the new age roommate that has a crystal for everything is a stereotypical extreme. Some people take things too far and get out of balance. But this isn’t who we all are. I’m sick of the tropes. It’s essentially saying, “Look at her, she’s stupid”, now point and laugh. When I was 5, this bothered me about people. Almost 30 years later, it turns out it still does.

Seriously. We are better than this. We are capable of giving one another respect.

And no, I’m not being “too sensitive” or whatever other thing you want to say about me to dismiss my opinion. It’s my experience, and it’s valid, whether you want to accept it or not. If not, at least own it.

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